ByJustin Gammill

Apr 4, 2014

Our Generation’s Snake Oil, What about my Hazmat Suit?

Our Generation’s Snake Oil, What about my Hazmat Suit?

In the early 19th century across the wild Western expanses of our growing nation, a common character in established towns was the “Traveling Doctor”, who in most cases was as much a medical practitioner as a ditch digger is a civil engineer. These pitchmen often hocked products that claimed to cure everything from headaches to uncontrollable flatulence that were often made of things like cocaine, turpentine, and most commonly-snake oil. The term “Snake Oil” in modern times isn’t referring to the liniments of the past, but as a term for a product that on the surface claims a solution, but in actuality has questionable quality or effect.

With the modern energy crisis reaching critical levels, one of the first such “cure-alls” to be forced on the consumers is the Compact Fluorescent Light (CFL). The CFL was sold to us with promises of lowered energy use, longer life, and overall “going green” gooey goodness. Through the clever use of lobbying, media campaigns, and unrealistic statistics our leaders were sold on the CFL hook, line, and sinker. They were so excited to show the world how green and progressive they are, and that they were doing more than placating the energy lobbyists with partisan rhetoric. So excited, in fact that they forgot to ask a simple question: “What happens to the bulb when it burns out? You just throw it away right?” Nope. CFLs contain mercury, which is toxic to just about every living thing on the planet. So, the problem now becomes what to do with the 400 million or so CFL’s that are purchased every year when they reach the end of their lifespan. Thanks to their mercury content, it’s not recommended to simply throw them away because they will contaminate everything they touch. Nothing like having a trashcan that reads your temperature …

So, unless someone can somehow develop a method …

Our Generation’s Snake Oil, What about my Hazmat Suit?

In the early 19th century across the wild Western expanses of our growing nation, a common character in established towns was the “Traveling Doctor”, who in most cases was as much a medical practitioner as a ditch digger is a civil engineer. These pitchmen often hocked products that claimed to cure everything from headaches to uncontrollable flatulence that were often made of things like cocaine, turpentine, and most commonly-snake oil. The term “Snake Oil” in modern times isn’t referring to the liniments of the past, but as a term for a product that on the surface claims a solution, but in actuality has questionable quality or effect.

With the modern energy crisis reaching critical levels, one of the first such “cure-alls” to be forced on the consumers is the Compact Fluorescent Light (CFL). The CFL was sold to us with promises of lowered energy use, longer life, and overall “going green” gooey goodness. Through the clever use of lobbying, media campaigns, and unrealistic statistics our leaders were sold on the CFL hook, line, and sinker. They were so excited to show the world how green and progressive they are, and that they were doing more than placating the energy lobbyists with partisan rhetoric. So excited, in fact that they forgot to ask a simple question: “What happens to the bulb when it burns out? You just throw it away right?” Nope. CFLs contain mercury, which is toxic to just about every living thing on the planet. So, the problem now becomes what to do with the 400 million or so CFL’s that are purchased every year when they reach the end of their lifespan. Thanks to their mercury content, it’s not recommended to simply throw them away because they will contaminate everything they touch. Nothing like having a trashcan that reads your temperature …

So, unless someone can somehow develop a method …

Our Generation’s Snake Oil, What about my Hazmat Suit?

In the early 19th century across the wild Western expanses of our growing nation, a common character in established towns was the “Traveling Doctor”, who in most cases was as much a medical practitioner as a ditch digger is a civil engineer. These pitchmen often hocked products that claimed to cure everything from headaches to uncontrollable flatulence that were often made of things like cocaine, turpentine, and most commonly-snake oil. The term “Snake Oil” in modern times isn’t referring to the liniments of the past, but as a term for a product that on the surface claims a solution, but in actuality has questionable quality or effect.

With the modern energy crisis reaching critical levels, one of the first such “cure-alls” to be forced on the consumers is the Compact Fluorescent Light (CFL). The CFL was sold to us with promises of lowered energy use, longer life, and overall “going green” gooey goodness. Through the clever use of lobbying, media campaigns, and unrealistic statistics our leaders were sold on the CFL hook, line, and sinker. They were so excited to show the world how green and progressive they are, and that they were doing more than placating the energy lobbyists with partisan rhetoric. So excited, in fact that they forgot to ask a simple question: “What happens to the bulb when it burns out? You just throw it away right?” Nope. CFLs contain mercury, which is toxic to just about every living thing on the planet. So, the problem now becomes what to do with the 400 million or so CFL’s that are purchased every year when they reach the end of their lifespan. Thanks to their mercury content, it’s not recommended to simply throw them away because they will contaminate everything they touch. Nothing like having a trashcan that reads your temperature …

So, unless someone can somehow develop a method …

Our Generation’s Snake Oil, What about my Hazmat Suit?

In the early 19th century across the wild Western expanses of our growing nation, a common character in established towns was the “Traveling Doctor”, who in most cases was as much a medical practitioner as a ditch digger is a civil engineer. These pitchmen often hocked products that claimed to cure everything from headaches to uncontrollable flatulence that were often made of things like cocaine, turpentine, and most commonly-snake oil. The term “Snake Oil” in modern times isn’t referring to the liniments of the past, but as a term for a product that on the surface claims a solution, but in actuality has questionable quality or effect.

With the modern energy crisis reaching critical levels, one of the first such “cure-alls” to be forced on the consumers is the Compact Fluorescent Light (CFL). The CFL was sold to us with promises of lowered energy use, longer life, and overall “going green” gooey goodness. Through the clever use of lobbying, media campaigns, and unrealistic statistics our leaders were sold on the CFL hook, line, and sinker. They were so excited to show the world how green and progressive they are, and that they were doing more than placating the energy lobbyists with partisan rhetoric. So excited, in fact that they forgot to ask a simple question: “What happens to the bulb when it burns out? You just throw it away right?” Nope. CFLs contain mercury, which is toxic to just about every living thing on the planet. So, the problem now becomes what to do with the 400 million or so CFL’s that are purchased every year when they reach the end of their lifespan. Thanks to their mercury content, it’s not recommended to simply throw them away because they will contaminate everything they touch. Nothing like having a trashcan that reads your temperature …

So, unless someone can somehow develop a method …

By Justin Gammill

He is "stealthy like a ninja at midnight, yet brazen like a champion Mexican fighting chicken". Justin Gammill approaches his topics in a manner that provokes thought, laughter, and the occasional “did he just say that?”. Chances are, yes, he most certainly did just say that. So, buckle up … you never know where the train of thought is going.